What were some of the best parties you went to?

I think back to the 70s. When I was in the musical world, I met a lot of gay people. They would host these lavish parties, and Robbie would encourage me to go.

My friend Judy was gay. She was a great inspiration to me, and a good friend. One time, we had to share a bed, and I gave her a big lecture before we went to sleep! Fancy that! Of course, she was like “oh Joyce, I would never ever do anything”. Now I know better, but I was still learning back then.

See, Robbie taught me about being open-minded. There was this fellow Dan who asked me out for supper after the pub closes. I said to Robbie “I don’t know whether you’d mind?” “Why wouldn’t I mind?” he said. So I became friendly with Dan and Billy. Then I realised they were together, and I thought “Oh well, that’s alright, because he’s not going to make a move on me, I like this.” He knew all the restaurant owners down Fitzroy St, so we’d go to a different place every time.

I once took Judy to a party hosted by a friend. She had absolutely no idea where we were going. It was full of gay people, including all the men from Ansett working in the planes. When the doors opened, her eyes went all big and her mouth dropped open. She said to me, you know more gays than I do!

I was asked to play there, and there were all the Melbourne Symphony Orchestra there. The singers and everything. I thought - oh my god! I can’t play anything in front of these people, I can’t play the squeezebox here. But they put my mind at ease. They were all like “no Joyce, of course you can.” So technically, I’ve played with the Melbourne Symphony Orchestra!

The man who hosted this party once rang my up to give me a job. He asked me to play on a boat, for Prince Charming and Cinderella - two men of course. He said, I can’t take my bloody grand piano on the boat, but you can take your squeezebox. It’ll just be community singing, and don’t worry, your glass will always be filled! I took Judy on that trip too, and she couldn’t believe it.

The Checkmates balls were amazing. I never knew what to wear, because all the girls were in suits and frilled shirts, and all the boys were in beautiful ball gowns that they made themselves. I got to wear their ballroom dresses in Saint Kilda Rd. Any time you want to, you could have your choice of all the dresses. They had better things in their wardrobe than I’ve ever seen!

Even though it was illegal at the time, I didn’t think anything of it. There were straights and gays at all these parties. I liked them because they were musical people, and their parties were better than ours! Anything for a party. They were so kind and friendly with me.

The word would go round - “Don’t approach Joyce, just leave her alone. She plays the squeezebox.” There was only one night they forgot to tell one person. That person kept sidling up to me, and I thought “Wait a minute, I don’t think she’s been told.” So I went over to Jenny Macro - she was our Union Rep at Australia Post, very tough lady, lost her leg in a motorbike accident. She took her out to the kitchen and sorted it. Oh, the attitude changed after that!

When AIDS came around, things went very sad. A lot of tragic things and kind of under the cuff. It was all hush-hush. I felt very sorry for them. People were so judgemental. But my answer to all was always: “Why does it matter what people do in their own bedroom?”

Having met all these people in the musical world, it helped me a lot when Harley came out. I had known so many people who were gay, that I kind of knew! We never discussed of course, until he came out himself. It just didn’t bother me at all. I adore him, I’d never hear anyone any a bad word about him!

I always remember going down to the Greyhound with Harley. Once they knew I was his grandma, they took me in. Everybody asked me for dances! A lot of my friends would never have done that.

I’ve been part of the scene without being part of the scene. And they treat you with respect, of course. I always feel very safe with gay people and thought, why would anybody pick on all these fun people! It’s been a very adventurous life.